NYE? ha.

31/12/11 - As you know it's New years Eve everyone is meant to be laughing, having a great night, saying goodbye to an old year, starting fresh basically. But for me it was completely different, want to know why? My 2011 was full of unexpectedly weird surprises. And frankly not good ones either. I don't want to go on about how 'shit' 2011 was for me i am simply going to tell you few moments of them since loads of people like to ramble on how shit it really is. Or on some occassions how amazing the year was. Anyway, 2011 made me stronger as a person; so from something so awful always comes something good that you can learn from, especially the mistakes you have made. So back to the night of 31/12/11 me and my friend had basically nothing to do, since you are meant to have plans for NYE, we however didn't. All of our other friends rambling about how they are going to celebrate it and gat 'wasted' start a new year whilst we would be at home probably watching gossip girl complaining about what to do. However, we still got ready as if we had something to do whilst I was getting ready, i thought why not speak to my 'ex' (and yes, it was wrong but i was drunk and didin't give a shit). I sent him a mail saying 'did you ring me?' - even though i know he didin't because i knew he didin't wanted to speak to me. Anyway he replied going 'no, now leave me alone'; i felt like a stalker, but me and my friend really needed to do something for NYE and we knew he was going to a HUGE houseparty so i thought maybe if i speak to him he would get us in. As it turned out he didnt and however he asked me back out?!?! I thought to my self hold on what the hell did jst happened and if you knew me well enough you would know no way in hell would i ever get back with him! We have shared way to many tears arguements and i knew it would be a really bad idea, but because i was drunk and needed to do something i said yeah if we go to the same party. Unfortunatelly he coloudnt get us in, so i ended up in a deep whole that i basically dug myself into. Yeey me, right? So what now? - basically we ended up going to the same party anyway since we got invited and then it was him and me, he wanted me back i didnt you can imagine the whole scenario that was happening, but because i am not the smartest of all people i managed to say to him whilst being absolutely drunk yeah why not come to mine and we shall speak about it... The thoughts in my head was amazing i thought yeah he will come around i will tell him no simple. But no, however we shall get to that later on. Carrying on with thte party dancing drinking, Then 1 minute left till 12 o clock, everyone waiting fro the countdown with the exciment on peoples faces to see was amazing, 10,9,8,7,6,5,4,3,2,1... HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE! Everyone started pouring drink all over the place the TV got knocked off as a usual house party everyone got soaking wet, i must admit it was a really good feeling thinking that I am going to start fresh with no more boyfriend ex troubles but at the back of my mind i knew i was going to have to deal with the fact that he is going to ask me out the next day and i am one of those people that just finds it really hard to say no. Anyway, lets get back to the night there is me taking pictures falling over kissing firends wishing them a great new year.. 2 hours later the party was going down and so me and my friend thought time to go home, and then my ex decided to walk us home. Greaaaat. The conversation was about the past as usual! Walking home through town seeing everyone pissed still drinking eating burgers, kebabs and all the fast food shit that was opened, we saw some friends from school wished a happy new year ... Till today i cant remeber the walk home and how i ended up falling asleep with a 'Ramones' t-shirt. Final words for this night AMAZING; but what the hell did i get myself into. You will have to wait and see! Peace out